You know what I miss, she said. I miss the curiosity, the finding of a different me. I miss the possibility of choosing, of changing, of loosing control. I miss loosing control without the fear of consequences, because there are no consequences, there's no one there to judge me.
Her eyes were bright and fast. He searched for a meaning in her words but had to ask: are you unhappy...?
Was her? She didn't feel sad, or frustrated. She was happy. So she replied, happiness has nothing to do with it. Happiness is just a state of mind and I want more than that. I want to feel the connection between my mind and my body. I want the truth.*
*Our eyes can witness amazing things, but our mind does more than that and interprets what our eyes are seeing, and so we're constantly divided between what we're feeling and the meaning of what we're feeling.
To be true means that you, and just you, carry the lightness of feeling and expressing yourself regardless the coherence and the logic of what is accepted by society. Means you're honest towards your fears, you're honest towards your desires, and you live free from expectation. Truth can be subjective or objective, relative or absolute, so it's always changing, there are facts that can be added, experiences that can prove you otherwise. Truth is permeable.
He hold her hand and said: if that's what you are looking for, the truth, then stop questioning it and be flexible to understand that the truth is what makes sense to you, truth feels right and will give you pleasure even if it's sad.
Not knowing what do next, the conversation had been so long, they decided it was time to let sleep take over their consciousness and all faded away...