Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Things are never the same again

When there was no more Me and You, I thought I would find myself again, but I wasn't the same person as before. I can stare for long minutes at my face, my smile, the funny way my hands hang from silly long arms, I can stare at all the pictures just months before I met You, and I can't see Me anymore. I was someone else.

I need to meet Me again.

You entered my life, and I felt exhilarated with the wonderful feelings of passion and love. I had a new face to recall in my sleep, I had a new smile to dream about, I had new funny thoughts to laugh by myself on my way to work, I had these new sensations on my skin, your touch, I had sudden shivers when out of the bloom a picture of your lips on my hips.

I'm not going to see You again.

I wonder sometimes where you are, who you are with, I wonder if you are stronger or just older. I imagine we meet each other again, accidentally and we spend three hours talking, three short hours to look at each other face expressions, and neither of us wants to leave. You and I again, and I know where I´m at, and I feel free and grown up. And everything is just perfect. I feel exhilarated again.

But I'm not same I was.
And you don't feel the same about us
And we are really apart.
Of all my fears, this is the worst.
You're gone. You are really gone.
Not that you met someone.
Not that you've moved away 5000km.
I lost you forever.
The We that I still believed to exist,
no longer lives in real time,
it stayed in the past.
I'm trapped in the past.

Today I feel the smell of your presence close to mine, today it still is as if you're looking into my eyes saying I'm the most important thing in your life. Today you still whisper in my ears: hey beautiful... Today I wish you were here.


“Live life so completely that when death comes to you like a thief in the night, there will be nothing left for him to steal.” - Oscar Wilde

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