―
C.G. Jung
Emotional Scenery - Inner Dreams:
The colors, music, feelings, flavors and scents of it.
Travelling...
Saturday, November 29, 2014
Thursday, November 27, 2014
... when things get too serious...
.. it's pretty old, but some things never get too something, right? : )
Super "Flight of the Conchords" ... Thank you!
Super "Flight of the Conchords" ... Thank you!
Wednesday, November 26, 2014
How to get out of a rut?
While procrastinating, I've found some videos about laziness and mind confusion... well here's a brief on it...
You want to stop the laziness high, right? So...
1. Do you have a Life Purpose? 5, 15, 30 years from now... Because if you don't, how will you ever become motivated about anything?
2. Find out what are your top 10 core values.
3. Where are you in your Life's cycle? (life works in cycles, as we're living there's a natural flow to it. We break up with something, we get motivated to start again, we engage in that energy, reach the climax, and then you go back to feeling you need a new chapter. And it's starts over again...)
4. Vacation... when was the last time you took some good "dolce fare niente" vacations?
5. Habits. Good habits are the momentum for success. Gently with yourself, taking it slowly, start creating good habits towards your goals, dreams, happiness. Ease in...
6. Believe... "Belief creates the actual fact. (...) There is no more miserable human being, than one in whom nothing is habitual but indecision. (...) The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitudes."
_
William James
7. Don't over think it. Start now, right now, act. Just f#$% do it. Stop looking for a quick trick, just put yourself into action.
8. Forget perfection. do what you can, but do it. Take the pressure out of yourself. Let the habit grow in you.
Keep that Positive Motivation
“The best way to learn, create and move forward is to be decisive. It’s OK to be wrong, but make a decision because then you’ll learn. At least you’ll know you’re wrong and can move on."
_
Jason Norcross
You want to stop the laziness high, right? So...
1. Do you have a Life Purpose? 5, 15, 30 years from now... Because if you don't, how will you ever become motivated about anything?
2. Find out what are your top 10 core values.
3. Where are you in your Life's cycle? (life works in cycles, as we're living there's a natural flow to it. We break up with something, we get motivated to start again, we engage in that energy, reach the climax, and then you go back to feeling you need a new chapter. And it's starts over again...)
4. Vacation... when was the last time you took some good "dolce fare niente" vacations?
5. Habits. Good habits are the momentum for success. Gently with yourself, taking it slowly, start creating good habits towards your goals, dreams, happiness. Ease in...
6. Believe... "Belief creates the actual fact. (...) There is no more miserable human being, than one in whom nothing is habitual but indecision. (...) The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitudes."
_
William James
7. Don't over think it. Start now, right now, act. Just f#$% do it. Stop looking for a quick trick, just put yourself into action.
8. Forget perfection. do what you can, but do it. Take the pressure out of yourself. Let the habit grow in you.
Keep that Positive Motivation
“The best way to learn, create and move forward is to be decisive. It’s OK to be wrong, but make a decision because then you’ll learn. At least you’ll know you’re wrong and can move on."
_
Jason Norcross
Wednesday, November 19, 2014
In the beginning there were Legos...
I remember, as I was little, in size and experience, to dream of becoming like the grown up people. As I played with Lego, I built houses and in those houses there were families living and rushing from one side to another. They were busy going to work, they were busy driving, they were busy cooking or re-doing their entire house!
That was my idea of what is was to grow up. I idealised that I would be self assured, organised, task's exterminator, goals achiever, and as easy as finding a pen in a woman’s purse, I would find the Love of my Life, get married and have kids.
That was what made sense to dream about and I couldn't wait to be old enough for it to happen. There was just school, the only thing that didn’t fit so well in the plans of growing up, but I did Ok. I was one of the teachers favourite, good grades, excellent report cards and during intervals I was the one that out stood everyone with my super fast run. No one could catch me and I would catch everyone!
- Simple and True Happiness...
What changed?
Doubts, second guessing and trusting others more than in myself. At the same speed as my body changed, a different look at myself started to happen. People started speaking to me differently, certain actions, words and thoughts ceased to be appropriate, and I couldn’t understand others so well anymore: were they speaking the truth, or lying. Before, when I was that little person, a lie would last a day or two at the most, but from this moment on, I understood that lies could last almost a life time, or 10 years.
Everything became 6th dimensional. I had what my eyes were seeing, but my nose would get a different impression and my mouth would say something completely unexpected. My ears would devil me with improbable secrets, my arms would fall into the wrong bodies and my mind would be firing up with a million different conclusions.
Of course this led me to that huge question: who am I?
I thought I knew who I was. I knew exactly what I liked, what I wanted and all the schedules to have an easy Life, away from mom’s railings. But since my body changed, the outside world seemed to change too… Something had changed.
From those years on, I had to find myself again. My routines, my likings and new friends. Only the dreams stay the same, but were kept locked somewhere safe, from the outside world and from myself also.
I had already found Love, but in the quest of wanting to answer that huge question, who am I, I was led to question even the Love I had found. This new 6th dimensional world had so many different lights, smells, colours and feelings, I wonder if I didn’t need to explore more.
And here’s where I started losing myself, even more. I started to look in the outside world what had always been inside me. I continued to question who I was, not to the person that mattered the most, but to others, to consequences, to this volatile outside world that changes at every second.
Because it took me this long to understand that this “me” that questions is the same “me” that answers, and it’s the same “me” that is in the world, and, prepare yourself, it is also the World! I only now realize that what I was looking for, all along, has always been with me since that first start, playing Legos.
It’s too much to take in, I get it. We also get so easily distracted with our jobs, fun times, sports, romance, family, but, when things get taught and we start to wonder what is it that we’re doing were, in this little blue planet, that’s when BIG questions start making a mess.
Usually science backs up our naive deep questions, like: where do I come from, where am I going, who am I, with a strong dose of chemistry and whirling quantic physics, complicated enough to put our Hercule Poirot persona away for some time, but then it comes back, and we ask again, where does it all come from??? in the lovely storytelling that society offers, there's that tiny detail that lingers, where is the beginning, and just like an ugly scratch in our favourite vinyl, ouch, it hurts our soul.
Where does it all come from? Where is the sense behind everything?
Terence McKenna used to say, modern science is based on the principle, “give us one free miracle and we’ll explain the rest”, and the one free miracle is the emergence of all the matter and energy in the Universe from nothing in a single instant, together with all the laws that govern it.
It’s the same as thinking, my computer works fine, my car, my body, but who design it? errr, no one, nothing… Where does it all come from?
I was touched with what Yogi Dada Gunamuktananda said, and as him, so many others.
“Both the substance and the intention of the Universe come from a deeper reality than the material one that we normally perceive with our minds and senses, and that reality is consciousness and all-pervading blissful awareness inherent in everybody and everything. Just as your own consciousness is the essence of your own mind, cosmic consciousness is the essence of the entire Universe. It exists within everything and everything it exists within it, essentially everybody and everything is part of and full of consciousness.”
Everything that exists is Life. Even a creature we normally term dead is alive. The process of dissolution creates Life. Everything consists of molecules in constant motion. We appear to be solid, yet this solidity is an illusion.
Lobsang Rampa gives us an amazing example to help us understand the abstractness in this thought:
“Consider a creature of infinite smallness who can stand at a distance from a human
body and look at it. The creature would see whirling suns, spiral nebulae, and streams akin to the Milky Way. In the soft parts of the body, the flesh the molecules would be widely dispersed. In the hard substances, the bones, the molecules would be dense, bunched together and giving the appearance of a great cluster of stars (…) Each Man is a Universe, a Universe in which planets molecules spin around a central sun. Every rock, twig, or drop of water is composed of molecules
in constant, un-ending motion. (…) Everything is relative, a wall which is solid to you may not be solid to a ghost or to a creature from the astral”
So many times we’re caught up feeling alienated, sad, misfit, unfairly put away, or sick, or lost, because materialism separates people and religion segregates them. But, if we get out of the “Box” and we imagine ourselves being part of the same matter that constitutes the stars and galaxies, we’re no longer alone, right? We’re made of the same thing that makes the sun shine! and the concept of everlasting Joy becomes tangible.
Instead of validating a world of isolation, let’s validate a world of oneness and hope for the Future. We’ll be happier! Not only as individuals but as a society. Let’s all think Love and therefore we are Love. Remember Descartes: “I think therefore I am” or according to Yogic philosophy: “I don’t think and there I am”. Just because we can’t prove there’s a Universal Consciousness it doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. There’re so many things that exist, that we can’t prove materially. Gunamuktananda gives a very simple and irrefutable example: can you prove a mom’s love for her child? because you can’t materially prove it, doesn’t it mean it’s not there?
Max Plank, German physicists of the late 19th and early 20th century, winning the Nobel Prize in Physics, explains what is Consciousness to him: “I regard consciousness as fundamental. I regard matter as derivative from consciousness. We cannot get behind consciousness. Everything that we talk about, everything that we regard as existing, postulates consciousness. (…) Science cannot solve the ultimate mystery of nature. And that is because, in the last analysis, we ourselves are part of nature and therefore part of the mystery that we are trying to solve. (…) As a man who has devoted his whole life to the most clear headed science, to the study of matter, I can tell you as a result of my research about atoms this much: There is no matter as such. All matter originates and exists only by virtue of a force which brings the particle of an atom to vibration and holds this most minute solar system of the atom together. We must assume behind this force the existence of a conscious and intelligent mind. This mind is the matrix of all matter.”
Or, “universally” known scientist, Mr. Albert Einstein: “The human mind, no matter how highly trained, cannot grasp the universe. We are in the position of a little child, entering a huge library whose walls are covered to the ceiling with books in many different tongues. The child knows that someone must have written those books. It does not know who or how. It does not understand the languages in which they are written. The child notes a definite plan in the arrangement of the books, a mysterious order, which it does not comprehend, but only dimly suspects. That, it seems to me, is the attitude of the human mind, even the greatest and most cultured, toward God. We see a universe marvellously arranged, obeying certain laws, but we understand the laws only dimly. Our limited minds cannot grasp the mysterious force that sways the constellations.”
Our brain is good at collecting data and performing analysis on that data, but to gain consciousness and become one full-complete happy being we can’t depend only on the brain. It’s bias. It echoes assumptions, and so many times, it can be the wrong kind of assumptions, such as, I’m not strong enough, I’m not smart enough, everyone is happier and more fulfilled than I am…
STOP! Don’t think ; ) gain AWARENESS…
1st step to become aware, to gain full conscious:
Meditate.
“Meditation is a fabulous method for stilling the mind and discovering what lies past the constant mind chatter that typically accompanies us throughout the day.”
Become a Meditation Technology geek to go deep within and get access to “personal guidance, communicating with departed loved ones, finding creative inspiration and improved focus, and most importantly, to get to know your deepest inner self, as an eternal spiritual being related to all that exists.” Words of Neurosurgeon Eben Alexander, that since a near-death experience (NDE), in which he spent a week in coma from an inexplicable brain infection, has turn his research towards the connection between our mind and spirit.
“Keep your best wishes, close to your heart and watch what happens”
―
Tony DeLiso
That was my idea of what is was to grow up. I idealised that I would be self assured, organised, task's exterminator, goals achiever, and as easy as finding a pen in a woman’s purse, I would find the Love of my Life, get married and have kids.
That was what made sense to dream about and I couldn't wait to be old enough for it to happen. There was just school, the only thing that didn’t fit so well in the plans of growing up, but I did Ok. I was one of the teachers favourite, good grades, excellent report cards and during intervals I was the one that out stood everyone with my super fast run. No one could catch me and I would catch everyone!
- Simple and True Happiness...
What changed?
Doubts, second guessing and trusting others more than in myself. At the same speed as my body changed, a different look at myself started to happen. People started speaking to me differently, certain actions, words and thoughts ceased to be appropriate, and I couldn’t understand others so well anymore: were they speaking the truth, or lying. Before, when I was that little person, a lie would last a day or two at the most, but from this moment on, I understood that lies could last almost a life time, or 10 years.
Everything became 6th dimensional. I had what my eyes were seeing, but my nose would get a different impression and my mouth would say something completely unexpected. My ears would devil me with improbable secrets, my arms would fall into the wrong bodies and my mind would be firing up with a million different conclusions.
Of course this led me to that huge question: who am I?
I thought I knew who I was. I knew exactly what I liked, what I wanted and all the schedules to have an easy Life, away from mom’s railings. But since my body changed, the outside world seemed to change too… Something had changed.
From those years on, I had to find myself again. My routines, my likings and new friends. Only the dreams stay the same, but were kept locked somewhere safe, from the outside world and from myself also.
I had already found Love, but in the quest of wanting to answer that huge question, who am I, I was led to question even the Love I had found. This new 6th dimensional world had so many different lights, smells, colours and feelings, I wonder if I didn’t need to explore more.
And here’s where I started losing myself, even more. I started to look in the outside world what had always been inside me. I continued to question who I was, not to the person that mattered the most, but to others, to consequences, to this volatile outside world that changes at every second.
Because it took me this long to understand that this “me” that questions is the same “me” that answers, and it’s the same “me” that is in the world, and, prepare yourself, it is also the World! I only now realize that what I was looking for, all along, has always been with me since that first start, playing Legos.
It’s too much to take in, I get it. We also get so easily distracted with our jobs, fun times, sports, romance, family, but, when things get taught and we start to wonder what is it that we’re doing were, in this little blue planet, that’s when BIG questions start making a mess.
Usually science backs up our naive deep questions, like: where do I come from, where am I going, who am I, with a strong dose of chemistry and whirling quantic physics, complicated enough to put our Hercule Poirot persona away for some time, but then it comes back, and we ask again, where does it all come from??? in the lovely storytelling that society offers, there's that tiny detail that lingers, where is the beginning, and just like an ugly scratch in our favourite vinyl, ouch, it hurts our soul.
Where does it all come from? Where is the sense behind everything?
Terence McKenna used to say, modern science is based on the principle, “give us one free miracle and we’ll explain the rest”, and the one free miracle is the emergence of all the matter and energy in the Universe from nothing in a single instant, together with all the laws that govern it.
It’s the same as thinking, my computer works fine, my car, my body, but who design it? errr, no one, nothing… Where does it all come from?
I was touched with what Yogi Dada Gunamuktananda said, and as him, so many others.
“Both the substance and the intention of the Universe come from a deeper reality than the material one that we normally perceive with our minds and senses, and that reality is consciousness and all-pervading blissful awareness inherent in everybody and everything. Just as your own consciousness is the essence of your own mind, cosmic consciousness is the essence of the entire Universe. It exists within everything and everything it exists within it, essentially everybody and everything is part of and full of consciousness.”
Everything that exists is Life. Even a creature we normally term dead is alive. The process of dissolution creates Life. Everything consists of molecules in constant motion. We appear to be solid, yet this solidity is an illusion.
Lobsang Rampa gives us an amazing example to help us understand the abstractness in this thought:
“Consider a creature of infinite smallness who can stand at a distance from a human
body and look at it. The creature would see whirling suns, spiral nebulae, and streams akin to the Milky Way. In the soft parts of the body, the flesh the molecules would be widely dispersed. In the hard substances, the bones, the molecules would be dense, bunched together and giving the appearance of a great cluster of stars (…) Each Man is a Universe, a Universe in which planets molecules spin around a central sun. Every rock, twig, or drop of water is composed of molecules
in constant, un-ending motion. (…) Everything is relative, a wall which is solid to you may not be solid to a ghost or to a creature from the astral”
So many times we’re caught up feeling alienated, sad, misfit, unfairly put away, or sick, or lost, because materialism separates people and religion segregates them. But, if we get out of the “Box” and we imagine ourselves being part of the same matter that constitutes the stars and galaxies, we’re no longer alone, right? We’re made of the same thing that makes the sun shine! and the concept of everlasting Joy becomes tangible.
Instead of validating a world of isolation, let’s validate a world of oneness and hope for the Future. We’ll be happier! Not only as individuals but as a society. Let’s all think Love and therefore we are Love. Remember Descartes: “I think therefore I am” or according to Yogic philosophy: “I don’t think and there I am”. Just because we can’t prove there’s a Universal Consciousness it doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. There’re so many things that exist, that we can’t prove materially. Gunamuktananda gives a very simple and irrefutable example: can you prove a mom’s love for her child? because you can’t materially prove it, doesn’t it mean it’s not there?
Max Plank, German physicists of the late 19th and early 20th century, winning the Nobel Prize in Physics, explains what is Consciousness to him: “I regard consciousness as fundamental. I regard matter as derivative from consciousness. We cannot get behind consciousness. Everything that we talk about, everything that we regard as existing, postulates consciousness. (…) Science cannot solve the ultimate mystery of nature. And that is because, in the last analysis, we ourselves are part of nature and therefore part of the mystery that we are trying to solve. (…) As a man who has devoted his whole life to the most clear headed science, to the study of matter, I can tell you as a result of my research about atoms this much: There is no matter as such. All matter originates and exists only by virtue of a force which brings the particle of an atom to vibration and holds this most minute solar system of the atom together. We must assume behind this force the existence of a conscious and intelligent mind. This mind is the matrix of all matter.”
Or, “universally” known scientist, Mr. Albert Einstein: “The human mind, no matter how highly trained, cannot grasp the universe. We are in the position of a little child, entering a huge library whose walls are covered to the ceiling with books in many different tongues. The child knows that someone must have written those books. It does not know who or how. It does not understand the languages in which they are written. The child notes a definite plan in the arrangement of the books, a mysterious order, which it does not comprehend, but only dimly suspects. That, it seems to me, is the attitude of the human mind, even the greatest and most cultured, toward God. We see a universe marvellously arranged, obeying certain laws, but we understand the laws only dimly. Our limited minds cannot grasp the mysterious force that sways the constellations.”
Our brain is good at collecting data and performing analysis on that data, but to gain consciousness and become one full-complete happy being we can’t depend only on the brain. It’s bias. It echoes assumptions, and so many times, it can be the wrong kind of assumptions, such as, I’m not strong enough, I’m not smart enough, everyone is happier and more fulfilled than I am…
STOP! Don’t think ; ) gain AWARENESS…
1st step to become aware, to gain full conscious:
Meditate.
“Meditation is a fabulous method for stilling the mind and discovering what lies past the constant mind chatter that typically accompanies us throughout the day.”
Become a Meditation Technology geek to go deep within and get access to “personal guidance, communicating with departed loved ones, finding creative inspiration and improved focus, and most importantly, to get to know your deepest inner self, as an eternal spiritual being related to all that exists.” Words of Neurosurgeon Eben Alexander, that since a near-death experience (NDE), in which he spent a week in coma from an inexplicable brain infection, has turn his research towards the connection between our mind and spirit.
“Keep your best wishes, close to your heart and watch what happens”
―
Tony DeLiso
Friday, November 14, 2014
The Will for Meaning
"(...) man's main concern is not to gain pleasure or to avoid pain but rather to see a meaning in his life."
_
Viktor Frankl
For most of us, thankfully, our basic needs are met daily. Not only we have food, a place to sleep, friends, we also have technology that allows us to know more about the world. But we also have infinite choices and no excuse not to be productive, creative, successful, smart, independent, strong, happy!
Do we feel happy most of the time? or do we feel more like trapped in "happiness"?
We know this, we know that material stuff doesn't bring lasting happiness, but why? What's lacking? Meaning. Things, people or actions bring us happiness when they mean something important to you.
"We need a different conception of happiness, more enduring and more
genuine, not dependent on external circumstances. (...) The key to a healthy life is having a healthy mind."
_
Richard J. Davidson
So we can work towards that Happiness!
People argue that the circumstances, the timing, the weather it's just not right. But what's not right is how we separate our left brain from our right, how we separate looking versus feeling successful.
Yes, the magic dust is: to Feel.
"Being an educated person requires—being a full person, requires a certain ability to deal with dissonance. (...) I’m Jewish, was raised Jewish. I brought up my kids in the
Jewish tradition. We celebrate Jewish traditions. And the religion means
something to me.
At the same time, I’m a scientist. And data means an awful lot to
me. And I clearly believe in evolution and it’s really hard to get away
from the undirected nature of change selected by environment and, you
know, the science I do has really, leaves very little room for purpose
in evolution. And yet there are deep reasons to want to have purpose in life. (...) I don’t attempt to reconcile the religious side and the scientific
side. Just as I don’t try to ever argue that the scientific way of
knowing is the only way of knowing. (...) You know, literature has ways of knowing that are non-scientific. (...) Art has ways of knowing that are different. Music has ways.
And maybe someday people will be smart enough to integrate them into
one common way of knowing."
_
Eric Lander
We need to feel there is something higher and greater than us.
"Studies of our biological constitution make it increasingly clear that we are social creatures of meaning, who crave a sense of coherence and purpose. Yet, our modern way of life seems to provide fewer and fewer opportunities to engage in the group life that satisfies these human needs—indeed, many of its structures and institutions stunts these very needs.”
_
Steven Quartz
Anne McIlroy, long-time journalist, when interviewing Dr. Beauregard, neuroscientist (from University of Montreal's psychology department) posed these questions about a scientific experiment with nuns: "Are humans
hard-wired to have religious or spiritual experiences, which are common
to almost every culture on Earth? What happens in the brain when they do
have them? Is it something that non-religious people might be able to
replicate with the right stimulation? Is a transcendent Buddhist
experience, often described as feeling connected to everyone and
everything in the universe, the same as Christians'
unio mystica? Can religion and spirituality make people healthier, as some studies suggest?"
So, not only we do better when we believe in something, we become healthier, happier and even more productive!
"Individuals and organizations that see themselves as “more spiritual” do
better. They are more productive, creative and adaptive. The people
in these organizations are more energized and productive because their
work isn't solely about stock options and vacations and coffee breaks.
Spiritual organizations are animated by meaning, by wholeness, and by
seeing their work connected to events and people beyond themselves. "
_
Mitroff and Denton
There's more...!
"I believe that inspired leadership boils down to two things. The world
would be a better place if we loved each other, and if we told the
truth. If I express love, will people think I am weak, flaky, without
resolve? A leader who has the courage to be humble, forgiving, loving,
and therefore authentic, is much more effective, and inspiring than one
who works using fear psychosis. I define love as the place where my
heart touches your heart, and adds to who you are as a person.”
_
Dr Lance Secretan, PhD
In the book "The Progress Paradox: How Life Gets Better While People Feel Worse",
Gregg Easterbrook writes: “Ever larger numbers of people enjoy
reasonable standards of living, but may feel an inner pang on the
question of whether their lives have purpose. Predicting transition from
‘material want’ is not to say that people will cease caring about
material things; it is a prediction that millions will expect both
pleasant living standards and a broad sense that their lives have purpose [emphasis added]. This is a conundrum, as the sense of meaning is much more difficult to acquire than possessions.”
In 2004, 10 years ago, here's what was predicted in Forbes Mag by journalist Rich Karlgaard: "(...) Meaning. Purpose. Deep life experience. Use whatever word or phrase you
like, but know that consumer desire for these qualities is on the rise.
Remember your Abraham Maslow and your Viktor Frankl. Bet your business
on it."
Would you like a formula? Guess what, someone already thought about it:
The Pleasant Life, The Good Life & The Meaningful Life!
From the founder of Positive Psychology:
- The pleasant life: a life that successfully pursues the positive emotions about the present, past, and future;
- The good life: using your signature strengths to obtain abundant gratification (through activities we like doing) in the main realms of your life;
- The meaningful life: using your signature strengths and virtues in the service of something much larger than you are.
Martim Seligman
Dr. Seligman believes that lasting happiness lies in progressing
through each until we achieve the ability to have most of our happiness
come from living the meaningful life. "Well-being cannot exist just in your own head. Well-being is a combination of feeling good as well as actually having meaning, good relationships and accomplishment."
Make each ring count...
—
Thich Nhat Hanh
Thursday, November 13, 2014
Fear exists to keep us comfortable, but it's uncomfortable...
Fear exists to keep us comfortable, but it's uncomfortable...
So... release it! Bah, who cares about being comfortable!
Isn't better to be uncomfortably being hold by someone you like ; )
or uncomfortably waiting in line for that thing you want!
or, just not felling so at ease to try out that new thing...
Accept that life is uncomfortable and get the most out of it!
... hey, start avoiding want's "uncomfortable" and you'll see, that huge cloud over your head, puff, gone ; )
Wednesday, November 12, 2014
Speak with/to your mind
Why is it that it’s so much easier to correct others while it’s so much tougher for us to correct ourselves?
“Correct your mind & the rest will fall into place”
_
_
Buddha
We're too easy on words. We say them out loud and most of the time we don't measure their strength and consequences. But when they're directed at us, we can feel them alright and the anxiety that surges inside either makes us grab a bar of chocolate, a drink or a pillow.
We need to learn how to speak with ourselves, how to negotiate, how to build a trusting and caring relationship.
We believe that what we think can stay inside. We believe that if we don't address it, no harm will come, as it lies within the serpentine chaos of our mind, no one will see it, and we'll still look calm and stylish. Well, it doesn't work like that...
What we think not only doesn't stay inside, hidden, as it can also harm us.
Our thoughts are like the air we breath. Toxic air makes you sick. Toxic thoughts make you sick.
So, next time you see that you're building up a terrible script, dialogue in your head, shout: CUT!
And repeat the scene, this time, with your heart in it.
Love and respect yourself.
Tuesday, November 11, 2014
Friday, November 7, 2014
The real Human Freedom - Choice
Does anyone ever come from an healthy background? Psychologically I mean...
Well, usually when parents show Love, not only towards their kids, but specially, crucially, between themselves, there's a chance for openness and care that allows anyone in the family to talk about their problems, their JOYS and that's healthy...
You don't think you come from an healthy background? Well, think again, or deeper.
Your background, despite of what were the environmental conditions, is actually your inner self. Something that came along with you before you were even born. You're spirit, your soul.
Nowadays most of us live with a inner fear for our own Life, our own mental health, our capacity of growing and becoming responsible adults, and when there's kids and other family members involved, the paranoia becomes even greater. And it's that same fear that imprisons us into a co-dependent life with the outside conditions. You can't control what your boss is thinking, or the financial markets tendencies, or what the psychological mood of the other drivers is. The only thing that is your own responsibility is yourself, your inner self, that "voice" that you were born with and that walks by your side your entire Life.
An example of this, one that you can't argue about it, is what Viktor Emil Frankl experienced in 1945, and so well described in his writings in "Man's Search for Meaning - Experiences in a Concentration Camp", Pocket Books, ISBN 978-0-671-02337-9 pp. 56–57:
"We stumbled on in the darkness, over big stones and through large puddles, along the one road leading from the camp. The accompanying guards kept shouting at us and driving us with the butts of their rifles. Anyone with very sore feet supported himself on his neighbour's arm. Hardly a word was spoken; the icy wind did not encourage talk. Hiding his mouth behind his upturned collar, the man marching next to me whispered suddenly: "If our wives could see us now! I do hope they are better off in their camps and don't know what is happening to us.
That brought thoughts of my own wife to mind. And as we stumbled on for miles, slipping on icy spots, supporting each other time and again, dragging one another up and onward, nothing was said, but we both knew: each of us was thinking of his wife. Occasionally I looked at the sky, where the stars were fading and the pink light of the morning was beginning to spread behind a dark bank of clouds. But my mind clung to my wife's image, imagining it with an uncanny acuteness. I heard her answering me, saw her smile, her frank and encouraging look. Real or not, her look was then more luminous than the sun which was beginning to rise.
A thought transfixed me: for the first time in my life I saw the truth as it is set into song by so many poets, proclaimed as the final wisdom by so many thinkers. The truth – that love is the ultimate and the highest goal to which Man can aspire. Then I grasped the meaning of the greatest secret that human poetry and human thought and belief have to impart: The salvation of Man is through love and in love. I understood how a man who has nothing left in this world still may know bliss, be it only for a brief moment, in the contemplation of his beloved."
Viktor then understands that "Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom. (...) Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms - to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way (...)"
This is one powerful thought, and we should let it resonate into our actions, so that our Life can be the truest expression of our potentialities.
So many times we drag ourselves through an infinite role of excuses. We rationalize that if only our job, our society, our wife/spouse, or parents, our body, if only the weather was sunnier, or actually rainier, then we could do/be better.
It requires a strong dosage of humbleness to become aware of our own responsibility towards life. And it requires a great deal of determination and creativity to overcome the challenges that come with that responsibility.
Now you could charge me with that crucial question: and when we get sick, or someone with no connection to us, harms us? I will have to ask you, how do you want to feel about that? You're entitled and you should feel angry! So many times Life is unfair. Why should children suffer so much pain, being neglected, abused, sick, forced to hold weapons. Where is the so called self-responsibility in that??? It's not. The outside factors such as pollution, toxic chemicals and toxic childhoods indeed govern our biological rhythms, BUT the spirit of those children, the spirit of that person that feels their Life threaten, lies in them only. The only thing one can hold onto is their own self-love, their own self-joy. Sometimes there are other souls that reach their hands for us to hold, and that might be the only thing we have in that moment, appreciate it. To be given Love, to feel the care of someone else’s spirit over our Heart, it’s such a wonderful reality. Dive into that thought. Release yourself from old beliefs and become the soul creative force in your own Life. Believe that your true self contains every possibility.
"Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself."
—
George Bernard Shaw
So many psychologist have mention that important step in one's happiness. Maslow called "self-actualisation", C. Rogers named "growth potential", Mahatma Gandhi or Mandela in their lives had to fought against harm, but they didn’t choose hate or violence. They were true towards their own self nature and they knew, at the core, that “you must be the change you want to see in the World.” So if you want to see Love, choose Love.
It’s the difference between being (re)active or (pro)active. The first makes you act without thought, lets you repeat the same mistakes, doesn’t allow real progress, and the second, to proactively live our Life, means that we choose our direction, our growth, independently of exterior conditions. As the word responsibility comes from the idea of being able to respond. Become that person that has the ability to respond thoughtfully to Life, don’t just let it be, passively, quitting on the world, or worst, of yourself.
Well, usually when parents show Love, not only towards their kids, but specially, crucially, between themselves, there's a chance for openness and care that allows anyone in the family to talk about their problems, their JOYS and that's healthy...
You don't think you come from an healthy background? Well, think again, or deeper.
Your background, despite of what were the environmental conditions, is actually your inner self. Something that came along with you before you were even born. You're spirit, your soul.
Nowadays most of us live with a inner fear for our own Life, our own mental health, our capacity of growing and becoming responsible adults, and when there's kids and other family members involved, the paranoia becomes even greater. And it's that same fear that imprisons us into a co-dependent life with the outside conditions. You can't control what your boss is thinking, or the financial markets tendencies, or what the psychological mood of the other drivers is. The only thing that is your own responsibility is yourself, your inner self, that "voice" that you were born with and that walks by your side your entire Life.
An example of this, one that you can't argue about it, is what Viktor Emil Frankl experienced in 1945, and so well described in his writings in "Man's Search for Meaning - Experiences in a Concentration Camp", Pocket Books, ISBN 978-0-671-02337-9 pp. 56–57:
"We stumbled on in the darkness, over big stones and through large puddles, along the one road leading from the camp. The accompanying guards kept shouting at us and driving us with the butts of their rifles. Anyone with very sore feet supported himself on his neighbour's arm. Hardly a word was spoken; the icy wind did not encourage talk. Hiding his mouth behind his upturned collar, the man marching next to me whispered suddenly: "If our wives could see us now! I do hope they are better off in their camps and don't know what is happening to us.
That brought thoughts of my own wife to mind. And as we stumbled on for miles, slipping on icy spots, supporting each other time and again, dragging one another up and onward, nothing was said, but we both knew: each of us was thinking of his wife. Occasionally I looked at the sky, where the stars were fading and the pink light of the morning was beginning to spread behind a dark bank of clouds. But my mind clung to my wife's image, imagining it with an uncanny acuteness. I heard her answering me, saw her smile, her frank and encouraging look. Real or not, her look was then more luminous than the sun which was beginning to rise.
A thought transfixed me: for the first time in my life I saw the truth as it is set into song by so many poets, proclaimed as the final wisdom by so many thinkers. The truth – that love is the ultimate and the highest goal to which Man can aspire. Then I grasped the meaning of the greatest secret that human poetry and human thought and belief have to impart: The salvation of Man is through love and in love. I understood how a man who has nothing left in this world still may know bliss, be it only for a brief moment, in the contemplation of his beloved."
Viktor then understands that "Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom. (...) Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms - to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way (...)"
This is one powerful thought, and we should let it resonate into our actions, so that our Life can be the truest expression of our potentialities.
So many times we drag ourselves through an infinite role of excuses. We rationalize that if only our job, our society, our wife/spouse, or parents, our body, if only the weather was sunnier, or actually rainier, then we could do/be better.
It requires a strong dosage of humbleness to become aware of our own responsibility towards life. And it requires a great deal of determination and creativity to overcome the challenges that come with that responsibility.
Now you could charge me with that crucial question: and when we get sick, or someone with no connection to us, harms us? I will have to ask you, how do you want to feel about that? You're entitled and you should feel angry! So many times Life is unfair. Why should children suffer so much pain, being neglected, abused, sick, forced to hold weapons. Where is the so called self-responsibility in that??? It's not. The outside factors such as pollution, toxic chemicals and toxic childhoods indeed govern our biological rhythms, BUT the spirit of those children, the spirit of that person that feels their Life threaten, lies in them only. The only thing one can hold onto is their own self-love, their own self-joy. Sometimes there are other souls that reach their hands for us to hold, and that might be the only thing we have in that moment, appreciate it. To be given Love, to feel the care of someone else’s spirit over our Heart, it’s such a wonderful reality. Dive into that thought. Release yourself from old beliefs and become the soul creative force in your own Life. Believe that your true self contains every possibility.
"Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself."
—
George Bernard Shaw
So many psychologist have mention that important step in one's happiness. Maslow called "self-actualisation", C. Rogers named "growth potential", Mahatma Gandhi or Mandela in their lives had to fought against harm, but they didn’t choose hate or violence. They were true towards their own self nature and they knew, at the core, that “you must be the change you want to see in the World.” So if you want to see Love, choose Love.
It’s the difference between being (re)active or (pro)active. The first makes you act without thought, lets you repeat the same mistakes, doesn’t allow real progress, and the second, to proactively live our Life, means that we choose our direction, our growth, independently of exterior conditions. As the word responsibility comes from the idea of being able to respond. Become that person that has the ability to respond thoughtfully to Life, don’t just let it be, passively, quitting on the world, or worst, of yourself.
Tuesday, November 4, 2014
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