—
in "The Wolf of Wall Street" movie
Wednesday, July 16, 2014
Courage
“The only thing standing between you and your goal is the bullshit story you keep telling yourself as to why you can’t achieve it.”
—
in "The Wolf of Wall Street" movie
—
in "The Wolf of Wall Street" movie
Monday, July 7, 2014
What is Life?
I guess there can be two main perspectives on Life: Life is what it is or Life is something much greater.
If Life is just what it is, then, the facts are that you have a Life expectancy of 85 years, so you have to survive and entertain yourself for 85 years. If Life is something that works itself out, then you have no control on the outcomes, and everything is a coincidence to put things in some right track.
It’s hard to believe in the second point of view. Everything seems to be random and wrong at times, that’s it’s just too hard to believe that there’s some ultra smart sense or purpose behind it.
But we want to believe there’s more. We want to believe that all our Love, Passions, Secret Dreams and all those deep feelings live beyond ourselves, in some sort of soul, some immaterial us.
We get excited through fantasy but maybe the belief of existing something more it’s just that, a fantasy.
The smart way to understand Life is actually to be very analytic about it. You are born, you’re taught a set of skills that enable you to work in the future as well as a set of skills to live in communion with other human beings, and then you get old, and that’s the moment you’ve been preparing for, by saving some money aside, and building a family. You get old and you stop doing most of the things you enjoyed until one day your body just shuts down.
It doesn’t have to be seen as a sad perspective on Life to look at it through analytical lenses. As said, it’s just the smartest way to live Life.
If you bring all the responsibility for a happy life into your own hands, then most probably you’ll live a happy live. Whatever way you choose to look at it, life is never an easy task. The same way some phone calls are hard to do, some talking, some choosing or some foods are hard to eat, life is hard to deal with it. It demands your full attention, and if you put it on hold, you’ll lose opportunities, you’ll lose pieces of it and you’ll regret not having been awake and more active towards life.
So, whether you think there’s more to Life than what we know so far, it is most definitely your responsibility, and everything you choose to do or not to do, shapes it into what your Life is. You’re in the drivers seat, you decide if you want to keep speeding it up or make some stop to refuel. If there’s a turn that maybe you should take to get to know someone, some place, come on, you can always get back into the main road. Hey, if your car gets broken, you can walk, if you can’t walk, you can be seated and be there to talk with whoever needs to hear.
So Life is what you are. It’s the song of your Heart and what you choose to do.
LIFE IS WHO YOU ARE.
If Life is just what it is, then, the facts are that you have a Life expectancy of 85 years, so you have to survive and entertain yourself for 85 years. If Life is something that works itself out, then you have no control on the outcomes, and everything is a coincidence to put things in some right track.
It’s hard to believe in the second point of view. Everything seems to be random and wrong at times, that’s it’s just too hard to believe that there’s some ultra smart sense or purpose behind it.
But we want to believe there’s more. We want to believe that all our Love, Passions, Secret Dreams and all those deep feelings live beyond ourselves, in some sort of soul, some immaterial us.
We get excited through fantasy but maybe the belief of existing something more it’s just that, a fantasy.
The smart way to understand Life is actually to be very analytic about it. You are born, you’re taught a set of skills that enable you to work in the future as well as a set of skills to live in communion with other human beings, and then you get old, and that’s the moment you’ve been preparing for, by saving some money aside, and building a family. You get old and you stop doing most of the things you enjoyed until one day your body just shuts down.
It doesn’t have to be seen as a sad perspective on Life to look at it through analytical lenses. As said, it’s just the smartest way to live Life.
If you bring all the responsibility for a happy life into your own hands, then most probably you’ll live a happy live. Whatever way you choose to look at it, life is never an easy task. The same way some phone calls are hard to do, some talking, some choosing or some foods are hard to eat, life is hard to deal with it. It demands your full attention, and if you put it on hold, you’ll lose opportunities, you’ll lose pieces of it and you’ll regret not having been awake and more active towards life.
So, whether you think there’s more to Life than what we know so far, it is most definitely your responsibility, and everything you choose to do or not to do, shapes it into what your Life is. You’re in the drivers seat, you decide if you want to keep speeding it up or make some stop to refuel. If there’s a turn that maybe you should take to get to know someone, some place, come on, you can always get back into the main road. Hey, if your car gets broken, you can walk, if you can’t walk, you can be seated and be there to talk with whoever needs to hear.
So Life is what you are. It’s the song of your Heart and what you choose to do.
LIFE IS WHO YOU ARE.
Tuesday, July 1, 2014
Monday, June 30, 2014
Why a Good Marriage Will Break Your Heart
Loving is not for the weak. We encourage people to love and desire their partner, never realizing what we’re encouraging them to do. Desire involves wanting and longing. Who among us really wants to want? Who is ready to crave their partner, without the guarantee that the partner will always be there to satisfy their longings?
The reason there are so many mediocre marriages isn’t because so many people are pathological or have imaginary family “diseases”. It’s because the really good marriages will break your heart.
In a long-term marriage, one partner will bury the other. The more a person wants and loves a partner, the more painful it will be when he or she loses them. There are all too few people developed enough to stand by themselves, hold their own hand through the loss of a partner, and accept Life on its own terms. That’s why desire problems are so common. This situation also spells out its solution. It’s not negotiation. It’s not compromise. It’s not a sexual technique. It’s growing up to the point that you’re willing to tolerate the loss of a beloved irreplaceable partner.
There’s only one way to avoid that inevitable loss, and many people follow that strategy: Don’t love your partner too well, so that by the time they die, they won’t mean that much to you anymore.
Like many aspects of life, the choice is not whether or not you’re willing to be anxious. The choice is which anxiety you’re going to, and you’re going to have one of them, whether you like it or not. You can lose your partner a little everyday or all at once.
Nobody ever gets to have a better partner than they’re willing to give up.
Willingly loving someone, knowingly setting yourself up for loss- that’s hard for people. It goes beyond resolving sex problems or personal insecurities. It’s an issue of integrity.
Marriage is a people growing machine.
It pulls and it pushes you. It stretches you to the point where you can embrace the processes of Life and love on their own terms. Like intense intimacy and eroticism, real love is not for kids. It’s not for “wounded children” who can’t soothe themselves. It’s for adults only. We may not like the process, but it makes us capable of profound adult desire. It’s not a quick process and it’s not as simple as improving sex. We need to have more respect for those brave souls willing to risk a successful marriage.
~
David Schnarch
The reason there are so many mediocre marriages isn’t because so many people are pathological or have imaginary family “diseases”. It’s because the really good marriages will break your heart.
In a long-term marriage, one partner will bury the other. The more a person wants and loves a partner, the more painful it will be when he or she loses them. There are all too few people developed enough to stand by themselves, hold their own hand through the loss of a partner, and accept Life on its own terms. That’s why desire problems are so common. This situation also spells out its solution. It’s not negotiation. It’s not compromise. It’s not a sexual technique. It’s growing up to the point that you’re willing to tolerate the loss of a beloved irreplaceable partner.
There’s only one way to avoid that inevitable loss, and many people follow that strategy: Don’t love your partner too well, so that by the time they die, they won’t mean that much to you anymore.
Like many aspects of life, the choice is not whether or not you’re willing to be anxious. The choice is which anxiety you’re going to, and you’re going to have one of them, whether you like it or not. You can lose your partner a little everyday or all at once.
Nobody ever gets to have a better partner than they’re willing to give up.
Willingly loving someone, knowingly setting yourself up for loss- that’s hard for people. It goes beyond resolving sex problems or personal insecurities. It’s an issue of integrity.
Marriage is a people growing machine.
It pulls and it pushes you. It stretches you to the point where you can embrace the processes of Life and love on their own terms. Like intense intimacy and eroticism, real love is not for kids. It’s not for “wounded children” who can’t soothe themselves. It’s for adults only. We may not like the process, but it makes us capable of profound adult desire. It’s not a quick process and it’s not as simple as improving sex. We need to have more respect for those brave souls willing to risk a successful marriage.
~
David Schnarch
Tuesday, June 24, 2014
Thursday, June 19, 2014
Wednesday, June 11, 2014
How anxiety looks like...
Short breath, untamed thoughts and a powerful wish of flying away to anywhere.
Accept it, but try to figure out where it comes from. What is it that you're missing. What do you desire so much that life itself is not sufficient? Is that desire for something real, or you've just imagined that there has be something else better out there. Maybe you already have what you need in you. Try to feel thankful for what you already are, and move on from there, not the other way around.
Accept it, but try to figure out where it comes from. What is it that you're missing. What do you desire so much that life itself is not sufficient? Is that desire for something real, or you've just imagined that there has be something else better out there. Maybe you already have what you need in you. Try to feel thankful for what you already are, and move on from there, not the other way around.
Monday, June 9, 2014
Challenge what you believe
So we think that we should grow old, accepting that we're old and so, all the things we used to do we cannot do them any more... STOP! You don't know that. We grow old, our body gets old, but our mind and spirit doesn't. And here lies the secret of eternal youth: to keep your mind alive, playful and as dreamer as any kid's head. Let go of what is common to think or do, and let yourself be inspired by LOVE. Love for music, Love for nature, Love for writing, Love for hugging and chatting... whatever pleases you. But challenge yourself, not only to listen music, but to play an instrument. Challenge yourself not only to watch nature, but learn more about it. Challenge yourself not only to remember your friends but write them a letter or make new ones.
Meet 83 year old dancer, Carmen De Lavallade:
Meet 83 year old dancer, Carmen De Lavallade:
Friday, June 6, 2014
Monday, June 2, 2014
"Life begins at the end of your comfort zone"
- Neale Donald Walsch
(...)
What it is and where it stops nobody knows
You gave me a life I never chose
I wanna leave but the world won't let me go
(...)
(...)
What it is and where it stops nobody knows
You gave me a life I never chose
I wanna leave but the world won't let me go
(...)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)